Tuesday, June 21, 2011

First post and where it all started

Many years ago, when I began my first steps on a personal growth path I was surprised that one of the first things my guide did was to make me talk about my early childhood, a time I didn't see as important. After all what could be that important in a period of my life when practically all I did was play, eat and sleep? I wasn't going to school yet, I didn't have any significant personal relationships, there was nothing very interesting there. However, as my process unfolded I discovered that much of what I am now, as an adult was formed in those early years. Most of my perceptions and beliefs about life were created then, most of my perceptions of my own self, of what I could or could not do in life had taken seed at that time too. I felt that as a child I was like a blank, pliable canvas my parents and caregivers could paint on and shape in any way they wanted, which they did according to their own beliefs, understandings and personal issues in life. As a child I, like everyone else had my own individual personality but the shape that personality took in me as an adult was the direct result of the way my parents took care of me when I was young.

Everyone who has taken care of a baby plant knows that if the plant is not given proper care and nutrients even if it grows to be an adult plant it doesn't look the same as the plants that come out of a nursery and have had the best care possible. The malnourished plant's leaves may be smaller and sparser, the plant may refuse to flower or may grow looking unhealthy and twisted. The same happens with human babies. We all have essential needs that if met in an appropriate way ensure we grow into fully developed, strong and healthy adults. However if, for whatever reason those needs are not met just like a plant we may grow to be weak, unhealthy people ridden with all sorts of physical, emotional or mental issues. As I began the process of healing and strengthening my own self I discovered that even if in age I was an adult there was an emotional side of me that was not fully developed and matured. I felt that inside of me I still had a child that had to be nurtured and grown up for me to be a fully developed being in my full potential as an adult. I also saw that when I lived my life from that child part of self the life I created tended to be a mess. After all how capable of managing an adult life a young child is?

I had to spend several years 'parenting' that young part of my self and through that I came to appreciate the importance of childhood in our development as human beings and the importance of the role a parent plays too. Knowingly or not we parents function as a Soul Keeper to a young being, our child's soul is entrusted in our hands to nurture and protect. It is a wonderful role every parent should respect and be proud of. Through my inner child work I directly experienced what a child truly needs as my inner child's needs were my own. I learned how to be a better parent to my own children too. Often that was a challenging process because it asked of me to deprogram myself from all the ideas I had received through my upbringing regarding the parent/child relationship and how parenting was to be done. That can be tricky because most of us are so attached to our beliefs and ideas. However I am extremely grateful for this process because it completely turned around my relationship with my children. What used to be filled with worries, conflicts and frustrations became a source of deep fulfillment and joy. Now I know from experience that parenting is not meant to be filled with problems and frustrations. It is a demanding 'occupation' but it is a simple and a joyful one. And if at times it feels like a drag that simply means we are not doing what is needed and that is usually a lot more simple then all the efforts we have put to make it a drag. I am grateful for all the help I have received over the years from my guides and from all my 'little teachers' - the children I have worked with who showed me the best what works and what doesn't in the magical kingdom called Childhood. It is my desire to share my experience in what I have learned about parenting hoping to help other moms and dads change their challenges with their children into better experiences and bring back joy to perhaps the most important job we will ever have - supporting a new being in their process of growth and being a PARENT. There is so much to tell :)

3 comments:

  1. Welcome to my new blog!

    Sharing any comments you may have or parenting topics you want discussed is most appreciated!

    Makayla

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  2. Makayla, congratulations on your new venture! I am looking forward to seeing how things develop.
    Great topic!

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  3. Thank you, Louise! I am excited!
    Be sure to follow me to get the updates. And if you want to break the ice and bring up a topic that interests you for discussion you are very welcome to.

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